Domestic violence

19/08/2009 4:41 pm

Very interesting..I will take a look at the article and the comments :) New to this site so I am just getting used to its functions

04/09/2009 4:44 pm

Well done for sharing Ged. Thanks for starting the thread Tom.

The issues and experiences are the same regardless of the gender of the vicitim. The main issue is not strength but power.

I welcome any initiative that offers support to male victims of domestic violence, and would welcome a more open society where a man does not have to be so disadvantaged by prejudice and ridicule for being abused.

In my own case I could not even get Police support, as they claimed that there was no case to investigate as there were no witnesses. I'm convinced that had it been a woman in intensive care rather than me, a case of attempted murder would have been pursued.

Within Housing it is not easy for a male abuse vicitim to gain support or justice. Too often it is the male vicitim who loses their home, and are given no priority for re-housing.

The support that is needed is Police and legal services, housing support and access to accomodation, a place of safety where emotional support can be given, and most of all being able to understand that this situation is very common, not one's own fault, and that life can be positive.

Additionally, the Family Court system must wake up to the extent and sophistication of female abusers and support fathers retain the family home and the custody of their children. Imagine the outcry if a child of an abusive husband was left in his care and the mother excluded; but too often children are gifted into the care of abusive wives, the father excluded and financially penalised on top.

07/09/2009 10:04 am

Kass, there is some enlightened views on this, for example some authorities have changed their homelessness forms so that they specifically ask male applicants if they are fleeing DV. And in those geographical areas were awareness is raised of the issue and availability of servive provision other aspects start to coinicide, police and HOs etc looking at this issue with increased seriousness (or even credulity)

Yet as this describes it is piecemeal and ONLY in areas with such provision. The rest of the UK tends to just see DV as male perpetrators and not as victims.

Provision and even acceptance of Male DV is very underdeveloped despite the statistical evidence that abounds. The offical figures showing that 102 women died as a result of DV also show 37 men died for example, or that while 1 in 4 women suffer DV 1 in 6 men do. Both of these are national statistics and fact. Yet the provision for women is about 100 times that for men, at least in terms of refuge provision.

Can a man flee DV and take the children? Or is that seen as some form of domestic kidnap and thus unlikely? The law needs to take a reconsideration of such views and national guidnace is needed from central govt to all housing and homeless providers. Yet without the provision of services such supporting evidence to 'justify' the need will not happen. Hence it is a catch 22 situation that simply remains buried and little gets done.

08/09/2009 2:21 pm

Its taken 40 years of concerted lobbying with public acceptance of the need for womens refuges and associated services. They are still oversubscribed and insufficient in mumber.

Given the societal scepticism over males as victims of DV it will take just as long for any realistic support and provision to be put in place.

Even with a strong government steer (that wont come - despite their own stats and forceful promotion of female DV) it would still take this long. So while i agree male DV is underreported and pride and other matters come into play the likelihood of services to prevent the 30 or so murders per year of males wont happen quickly.

I realise thats emotive but what other 'group' that suffer 30+ murders per year would be ignored in such a way?